- Sexual abuse or assault is a crime.
- Sexual abuse and assault happens to men and women, by men and women. It’s more about power than about gender—although more perpetrators are men than women, and more of those victimized are women.
- The perpetrator is often someone the victim knows: boyfriend, date, spouse, family member, father, mother, brother, sister, other relative, acquaintance, neighbor, family friend, teacher, or others familiar to the victim.
- There is no excuse for anyone to force or manipulate another person into sexual contact, or talk to them in a sexually-inappropriate way. There is no excuse or justification for the action of the perpetrator. The perpetrator always has the ability to stop and withdraw.
- “If you give a woman, or a man for that matter, without his or her knowledge a drug, and they have sex with that person without consent, that’s rape. And I think this country, any civilized country, should have no tolerance for rape.” (President Barack Obama speaking of Bill Cosby’s sexual misconduct allegations and the issue of drugs, consent and rape, CBS This Morning, July 16, 2015)
- Marriage does not permit one spouse to sexually abuse the other spouse.
- The violation is never the fault of a child who is sexually assaulted.
- The victim’s ability to forgive does not spare the perpetrator justice of the law.
- Victims of sexual assault may feel angry, depressed, numb, fearful, anxious, sad, on an emotional roller coaster, fearful of people, have flashbacks of the event, and have a difficult time trusting others, including God. This abuse can destroy trust in all other relationships.
- When sex offenders are released from the correction facilities in our community, the Dept. of Corrections decides where a sex offender will be released. Some are not allowed to live next to their victims in a small community.
- Spokane has a lot of services for sex offenders, such as treatment and housing.
- More than half of sexual assault victims are children under the age of 18, and girls are abused twice as often as boys.
- One in every 5 women in college is a victim of a sexual assault. (President Barack Obama’s Administration, CBS This Morning, January 2015)
- One in 5 women and 1 in 16 men are sexually assaulted while in college. This occurs on small, large and prestigious colleges. (CBS News, May 2, 2014)
- One in 6 men experiences sexual abuse by age 18, according to one of the largest national surveys on the topic.
- Sexual assaults in the military are disturbing, and unacceptable. The U.S. Defense Department says that a woman in the military is more likely to be raped by a fellow soldier than she is to be killed by enemy fire. Justice must be served, meting out appropriate punishments for people who have committed crimes—sexual assaults, rapes—and removed from the military.
3,000 sexual assaults are reported every year, but only a handful of them ever go to trial, and even fewer result in convictions. Of those convictions, 1/3 of those convicted are still serving in the military. (3,191 sex assault cases were reported in 2011; and 3,158 were reported in 2010.)
19,000 sexual assaults are suspected, but never reported because the victims are afraid to come forward. The victims fear no one will listen to their claims, and they will not receive justice. A victim needs to know that she will be able to prosecute the criminal who has attacked her. Criminals must be brought to justice and held accountable and more transparency in the system. (Senator Kirsten Gillibrand’s Office, Armed Services Subcommittee, CBS News, March 8, 2013; U.S. Defense Secretary Leon Panetta, NBC Nightly
News, January 18, 2012
Unwanted sexual conduct among servicewomen. The Pentagon’s figures (May 2013) show sexual assaults are on the rise in the military. The Pentagon released new figures showing a continuing rise in sexual assaults in the military. A 6% increase from 3,192 (in 2011) to 3,374 reports of sexual assault in fiscal year 2012, compared to the previous year. Estimates of the actual numbers of what is a notoriously under-reported crime go much higher. According to Pentagon figures an estimated 26,000 service women experienced unwanted sexual contact – up from 19,300 two years ago (2010)—a number the Pentagon says is unacceptable. (CBS Evening News, May 6, 2013)
- Sexual assaults in the Peace Corps. Nearly 20% of volunteers suffered some type of sexual assault during their service. More than half of those experienced repeat assaults. Some survivors were blamed or punished. Nearly half did not report the assaults. The Peace Corps is a government agency. Many Peace Corps personnel accused in sexual assaults were allowed to resign, instead of being processed; and then allowed to reapply to the agency. Transparency and reforms are being made at this time. ("Peace Corps - Sex Assaults," CBS News, November 30, 2015)
- If you are being sexually abused by anyone, find one person you trust, and tell them.
- Carry a whistle. Always be aware of your surroundings and protect yourself.
- Help educate citizens of the need to report rapes and assaults, including date rapes and assaults by perpetrators the victim knows.
- Women, men and children who have been raped
should go to the Emergency Room of any hospital as soon as possible,
and request a rape exam. A specially trained nurse will use a Jane Doe
Rape Kit to gather physical evidence of the assault (storing needed
samples of hair, body fluids, etc.), as well as photographs. A number
will be placed on the envelope holding the evidence. Police will not
open the envelope unless the victim decides to press charges. (Federal
Violence Against Women Act)
- Victims of sexual abuse should seek counseling with
a minister or professional counselor. Victims can heal and overcome
this suffering. Healing from abuse will relieve the victim’s pain and
suffering and bring renewed happiness. Victims must be willing to let
others help—family, friends, counselors and church
- Encourage schools to teach the legal and emotional consequences of sexual assault in their sex education classes
- Remember that background checks do not always catch those who might harm children. Most abusers don’t have a criminal background, and are often put into positions of trust in a child’s life.
- Sexual abuse is everyone’s business.
Men in particular must take a stand and begin talking about abuse. Men
in business and government must stand up and defend their wives,
daughters, sons, sisters and mothers. Men must also teach their sons
and other men to respect women.
- Ask men to help prevent rape. Sexual assault or violence against women or domestic violence are learned behaviors, and they can be unlearned. Ask men to develop prevention skills.
- Help establish and enforce a “Community Standard of Decency.” Pornography
drives sexual deviancy, violence against women, and child sexual
abuse. (See “Addictions/Pornography—Understanding the Laws and Your
Rights” on this website.)
- See that all sex traffickers are prosecuted to the fullest extent.
Compare the penalty and supervision for sex offenders in different
states, and encourage our legislators to impose the highest penalties on
those who prey on children.
- In recent years, Texas proposed that sex offenders who are twice convicted of raping children under 14 get the death penalty.
- In recent years, Connecticut proposed
that sex offenders be required to register any e-mail addresses,
instant message addresses, or other Internet identifiers with the state
police; and those who don’t report the information would face up to 5
years in prison. Connecticut also wants to make it a felony for any
person to misrepresent his or her age on the Internet to entice a minor
to engage in sexual activity.)
- Teach Teens to fight back. One in four girls are date-raped by the time they graduate from college. Teach girls and women to “Just Yell Fire” to prevent attacks. Download FREE. http://JustYellFire.com
- In the Event of Rape. In
all 50 states, the law says that if you are forced into sex by anyone
(boyfriend, husband, intimate partner, teacher, or anyone else)—that is
called rape. It is a crime for a husband to force his wife to have
sex. These women can come forward and tell a doctor, a friend, and the
police. You have a right to say “No!”
- Keep a journal and document the abusive behavior, and keep the journal in a safe place.
- If someone rapes you, go to the hospital within 48 hours. They have trained sexual assault nurse examiners who know how to collect evidence that will hold up in a trial.
- File a police report, even if you are not ready to file charges.
- Immediately after a rape, tell someone where you are going, and go to a safe place.
- Friends and family who suspect abuse should document dates and concerns.
747-8224 Lutheran Social Services Sexual Assault Center
1-800-799-7233 The National Domestic Violence Hotline
- Women – Listen to your gut-feelings when you feel that “something is wrong.”
- Request the Spokane Police Department’s Sexual Assault Unit (Deputy
Jerry Keller) talk to your Block Watch group or other neighborhood
organization about sex offenders. Call (509) 625-4272.
- Determine if there is a known sex offender living near your home, by viewing the list of Washington offenders at http://waspc.org.
Explain to your children that if anyone from that household tries to
contact you or make friends with you, your children must tell you. This
site includes photos and descriptions of area sex offenders. Level 3
sex offenders are those that are considered most likely to re-offend.
- Parents— After reading and approving the book “The Swimsuit Lesson,”
by Holsten and Freeman, consider reading it to your children. This
book teaches children to keep themselves safe. It helps prevent child
sexual abuse by protecting kids from predators, and teaching children of
their responsibility to tell.
- Do not drive with your car doors unlocked, or
leave your car unlocked while parked. If a stranger signals you to
pull over, drive to a well-lit gas station or populated area where
offenders will not follow.
- Remain alert in parking lots
where offenders can hide easily between cars. Avoid walking to distant
or dark parking areas alone. One in 12 crimes of violence happens in a
parking lot. If you are worried, ask a store or parking lot attendant
to accompany you.
- Leaders of Youth Programs. Study the policies adopted by the BSA to help provide barriers to child abuse, which serve to protect youth from sexual assault, and protect adult leaders from false accusations of abuse:
- Lutheran Social Services Sexual Assault Center,
747-8224. Volunteer advocates are needed to provide support and crisis
intervention for the center’s 24-hour crisis hotline. Training is
- Partners with Families & Children: Spokane
Their mission is to begin the healing for children who have been abused or neglected,
as well as seeking justice for them. Children and their families, who
are affected by child abuse, neglect and exposure to drugs and violence,
receive expert evaluation and treatment services. Working with various
agencies such as law enforcement, health professionals, social workers,
attorneys, and the court system, they have created a safety net
designed to prevent children from falling through the cracks.
Partners with Families and Children provides a room
where a child who has been sexually abused can tell the story once to a
social worker while police and CPS investigators observe through
one-way glass. A doctor is able to conduct an exam in a nearby room,
and a staff member is able to refer the child and family to a therapist
for ongoing counseling. This program started at Spokane’s Deaconess
Medical Center, and is an accredited hospital-based children’s advocacy
This organization replaces the chaos of a hospital emergency room where
a traumatized child is examined by a doctor, then retells his/her story
to a steady stream of strangers, from the nurse, to the social worker,
to the CPS caseworker, to the police officer, to the prosecuting
Through careful documentation and shared resources, agencies can make sure that those who harm children are punished.